Taking Over Japan

Apparently it will require more than one facebook advertisement. 17,924 impressions netted a whopping 10 clicks, total. Total failure if considered an effort to actually move product, but check this rationalization out: I'm building a fucking brand here, people! A BRAND! Whatever; the whole campaign only cost me 1.39 USD, which is like 25 Yen or something.

Plus, I still need to talk to an old Intarweb Enemy from USENET days, now that he's like "Lord of Bookin' Weird US Bands In Japan and Havin' Japanese Hipsters Actually Show Up At Those Shows 'N Shit". Timing == Everything.

Speaking of which...

Timing == Everything

Timing can apparently change. Either that, or waiting changes shit. I don't pretend to understand how any of this stuff works. Also, it is true: I-280 is a much prettier drive than 101, depending on circumstances.

Sunday Morning Playlist

1. In the Garden - Fred Lowery
2. Air Aid - Menomena
3. The Penalty - Beirut
4. Don't Fence Me In - Crosby, Bing
5. somebody - aaliyah vs. djginsu
6. Protected From The Rain - Grandaddy
7. Simply Beautiful - Al Green
8. Three Little Birds - Bob Marley and The Wailers
9. Randy Costanza - Solex
10. That Time - Regina Spektor
11. Elephant Gun - Beirut
12. Nice Work If You Can Get It - Billie Holiday

I bolded the one I'm on now. Hopefully, this motherfucker will be posted by the time we get to "Nice Work If You Can Get It". Fascinating meta-shit, eh? Oh, you know you love it.

Fuck.

I know more than I want to know. I guess I'm glad I know, but it puts me in a forced choice situation, which I would have preferred to have avoided. Oh well, I would prefer to have a pony, as well, and I'm not getting that, either. Ignorance, in this case, may not be bliss, but it's a fuckload simpler.

Facts To Distract

Here are some facts for you to memorize:

• Duboce Park was named after someone. Precisely who doesn't really matter.
• Sometimes sequences of coincidences are mistaken for fate by those wanting to see such things in that way. And sometimes other people, as well. Fact! I have spoken it! Behold!
• Matt Pond PA bores the living shit out of me. Unfortunately, iTunes seems to want to rub a whole bunch of it up on me. Next!
• Sliced pear + stilton cheese + bread = delicious.
• Homeless people are less likely to bother you if the first thing you say to them is "I'm working".
• I just coughed up goo. Right now. 10:58am. It was pretty gross. AGAIN: CERTIFIABLE FACT.
• As many facts as I list, I'm still thinking about one thing.
• Squonk's cover of Kashmir is at least twice as good as the original.
• I foresee skiing in my future. Probably awful skiing, but skiing, regardless.

I Wonder About New Orleans

And just how much wreckage there is to see if one wanted to go see wreckage. If only there were an electronic method to investigate, perhaps a network of resources or something. Oh fucking well.

Perspective

Somewhere, right now, someone is bleeding to death. Someone is choking on their own vomit, and someone is drowning. I have none of these problems. Things can always be much, much worse.

One More Thing

Got to totally shut down a "videoblogger"'s "videoblogcast" outside of DonutWorld on Friday at closing time by having a gigantic Ford F650 box truck back up slowly (complete with unbearably loud backup siren) right into their entire field of vision. Just for fun. Fuck you, videobloggers! The security dudes found the whole thing endlessly amusing, as they'd wanted to kick the whole blog posse off the front walkway for some time, but didn't want to cause a "crackdown by Donut Police" videoblog drama. Life is complicated these days; basic rudeness will still solve a number of these complicated problems. It is easier, after all, to beg forgiveness than it is to ask permission.

Guess what song just started playing? NICE FUCKING WORK IF YOU CAN FUCKING GET IT, FUCKERS! Postin' time. And more coffee time. And possibly poopin' time, round deux. Who knows? Can't imagine what I'd shit...