Place the First, iTunes Music Store. They are available in iTunes Plus format, so even those of you that truly hate Baby Jesus, Puppies, Apple Pie, and America can buy it and play it, free of the sugary goodness of digital rights management systems.

For those of you who hate all of the above, and, more importantly, hate me and the side of the bread upon which my sandwich is buttered, you may also buy the album from that other place.

Thirty fucking songs for 9.99. I don't know what it costs at Amazon, but it's probably less. Whatever. I still get all the money. Almost. Of which there will be little to none, I'm sure. But still. And actually, this time around, Mister Queue gets some of the money, as do my friends Sean, Rick, and Mike, seeing as how they all contributed to the damned thing.

Just think, by buying the whole thing, you're saving, like, twenty bucks by buying a double album for the price of a normal album! You'd have to be insane to pass up a deal like that. Oh, if only I had the benefit of a decade of major label promotion behind me, then I could posture about how awesome I am for selling my music myself. It was, however, my only choice.

I think I may even buy a facebook ad, so that all my coworkers who never ask shit about my music can ignore the fact that I have a creative outlet online, just like they do in real life. Symmetry, bitches. Symmetry.

In other news,

I left the house today, briefly, to try and buy some shit from Guitar Center, seeing as how they're having this big-assed sale, and shit. I stood around for probably 10 minutes without being helped by any one of the bored sales staff, then walked out, called a cab home, and ordered all the shit I wanted from Guitar Center's website. I have 2206.42 less now, but in a few days, I'll be receiving the following:

• Crown Sound Grabber II PZM Condenser Microphones - Pair (#278420)
• M-Audio Studiophile AV40 Powered Reference Speaker System (#600092)
• M-Audio ProjectMix I/O (#702521)
• M-Audio Axiom 49 49-Key USB MIDI Controller (#706314)
• On-Stage Stands Tripod Mic Stand with Boom - Buy One Get One Free (#453710)
• RockStand by Warwick 5-Guitar Folding Stand (#455001)

I'm having second thoughts about buying a car. Seems a little foolish to spend 17k on a tiny little Smart fortwo Passion Cabriolet when I don't plan on needing it much past the end of 2008. Then again, it feels like I'm shitting money, and what else would I spend it on, anyway?

Now, since my head hurts, I suppose I should eat again. You know, it seems like I ate just yesterday; can it really be fucking food time again? Oh, the humanity.

In other, other news,

Half the people at work are pushing me at a freshly-broken-up cute girl downstairs. The other half are trying to get me to eat more. I have no interest in either, any more.

Update [2008-1-12 22:22:24 by MohammedNiyalSayeed]: I just bought a highly-targeted facebook ad for the Japanese distribution of the album via iTunes Music Store; my ad will only be visible to some 6000 female Japanese girls who list 'music' as an interest. If this doesn't make me a cult hero in that weird-ass place, I may have to kick my game up a notch.

Suitably Japanese, I feel.